Week 5
Four participants attended the workshop, Legacy in Story, held Monday afternoon at the Manor. An overarching goal was to broaden the impact of the Spiritual Care Department beyond the "regulars" who attend its weekly events. To this end, I planned a topic that might have broad appeal to those not readily responsive to spiritual topics, but which would also connect to spiritual interests. I used the image of the hero's journey, adapted to reveal the "heroic" journey of everyone's life. The purpose was to encourage participants to take a fresh look at their own life experience through a familiar lens and/or to take a new look using an unfamiliar lens so as to tell their story/stories to friends and family reimagined in transformative ways. As Carol Pearson in The Hero Within writes, "Heroism for this age requires us to take our journeys, to find the treasure of our true selves, and to share that treasure with the community as a whole—through doing and being fully who we are. To the degree that we do so, our kingdoms are transformed."
This latter approach particularly invites looking at the less desirable corners of life, e.g., areas of disappointment, perceived failure, loss, and the unreconciled. To encourage this, I tried to offer a safe space that would not demand emotional disclosure or factual self-report. Yet, I included examples of these in my overview and explanations. As Jesus modeled inclusivity through his everyday life socializing with and responding to outcasts of many stripes, we too can model acceptance by leading the way in disclosure or self-report. I assure you no "outcasts" attended this workshop, but when I offered an illustration of one of my personal "failures," one participant in particular laughingly identified, saying she too had "failed" in the same way. We then laughed together recalling our youthful folly. Through such acceptance, the most reticent member of the group gradually relaxed into its receptive atmosphere.
I thought this week about Bette Davis' saying that "Old age ain't for sissies". As I visited different facilities and a number of elders in each, I recognized heroes all around. One woman with smooth, pure white hair has an elegant face carved with beautiful evidence of a richly expressive life. A group of PACE participants cheerfully painted flowers with full respect for lines and details. A sweet lady cuddled her familiar, an infant-sized babydoll, as she wandered a bit among the crowd. I listened to descriptions of home and history and everyday experiences taking the bus as well as worries over housing, loss of precious ability, and neglectful children. And one woman spoke with deep gratitude for her PACE, highlighting all the reasons she is pleased to be there--the people, the good food, the clinics.
I encouraged the participants on Monday and an ailing woman alone in her room on Tuesday and a disabled woman hoping for a second career on Wednesday to be their own heroes. I recall a quote from the Tom Hanks character, Joe, in the film, Joe Vs. the Volcano, who, after waiting in vain for a rescue, realized, "I am my only hope for a hero". Joe, like Jesus, recognized that we each must live our own lives. We each must take responsibility for its heroic journey. We each must carry our own crosses, face our own destinies, and, ultimately, tell our own stories in the best way we can. And, like Jesus, in the most painful and frightful moments of our lives, we can call upon our God for help beyond imagining.
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